'Our attitude toward life determines life's attitude towards us' Anon

Wednesday 15 August 2012

Fear.... its so irrational

Fear is so irrational.....yesterday was so bad I didn't know what to do with myself.  What was causing this totally life sucking emotion? I have no idea!!!   I just didn't want to go out, do anything or even think. I've got the car I always wanted a few weeks ago (2nd hand one), unfortunately it has had a couple of problems and today has come back from the garage... this has totally un-nerved me, why don't know.  I haven't really driven a car since last October, that I was fine with.  This time its different.  Like I said totally irrational and off the scale.....  trouble is, it's not only driving thats freaking me out, even thinking of doing anything is sending me into panic status... i was like this many years ago, but I got it sorted and got on with my life.  What is different now I have no idea.  Is it because its a bigger car (6 gears)?, living in a new area (been here 8mths)?, trying to start up a business?  I went on the Bach's Centre website (as in Rescue Remedy)and ordered a customised Natural Flower Tincture, which has really helped me (must order more).. I can recommend this site if you do need assistance.  Am I going mad (probably)?, is there anyone else out there feeling like this?  I go out of my front door, put on smile and carry on.  I do feel positive about life and what I am achieving, I just can't reconcile the two emotions.  Is it that 'time' of life? is because I'm entering a new phase of my life? I just don't know......
No doubt I will get through this, come out the other side and think 'hum yes that was daft'....... I think about the positive happenings of the day, focus on that and take comfort.  At least when I go to bed now I sleep deep (even if do wake up once or twice) thats the Remedy helping me there....
I am just fininishing making a Guardian Angel to travel with me in the car.  It does all sound so 'barmy' but if it brings me peace of mind what the heck...
Am i over thinking situations? they are never as difficult as you think they will be, so what's the problem??????  
At the moment I'm looking out of my window at the rain, listening to the thunder, knowing my poor dog Mollie will be hiding somewhere from the noise. Thank God for Mollie, such unconditional love and adoration, what great snuggles she gives, makes me laugh at her antics, most of all Mollie makes me feel safe. Ciao

7 comments:

  1. Oh Olive, I'm so sorry you are feeling like this. I totally understand how you feel having been there myself in the past. It will pass and like you say you will wonder what all the fuss was about but at the moment you probably feel as though there is no light at the end of the tunnel. Have you tried journalling? Sometimes writing down your thoughts/feelings helps to off load them from your system. Of course us crafty folks have the added benefit of being able to create a journal page first - more distraction. Take care and if you want to chat send me an email and I'll let you have my number, x

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  2. What ever makes you feel better is good for you!

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  3. I feel for you Olive. I can let you have remixes of your Bach remedies if you know what they have included in your customised blend. I have the practitioners set of them as I did at one time start a practitioners course in Lancaster Uni. (Never finished it as I got my BBC job)
    If you can get Mechtild Scheffers book, the Complete Approach to Bach Flower Remedies, it's the best I've ever used and you will be able to help yourself get through....
    Please contact me any time...
    Thinking of you hun, love Jo x

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  4. Never been to Crosby Beach? You used to love right by it! :P

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  5. Sometimes I think life just gets us like this, but the flower remedies are probably helping so stick with it and let things ride themselves out... sending good vibes your way :-)

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  6. Dear Olive, first of all let me thank you one more time for the lovely lovely gifts you sent me. I am ever so grateful you thought of me in such a special way! Hope you are feeling better. Hang in there, you've been through quite a lot of changes lately and perhaps what you are feeling is just an aftermath. Better times will come, just wait and see. Sending you hugs and lots of good wishes. Love, Alina.

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